open sez me (and the surgeon too)

after the surgeon read thru my recent health history (aka War and Peace) on the computer on friday and then examined me, including camera up the butt, he gave me the news. the surgery is a go. yep, that’s right. after 7 months i am recovered to the point that my body can handle the surgery.

naturally i am scared but also i am excited. if all goes well, they will perform a laparoscopic surgery using the Hartmann procedure. this has nothing to do with my grocery store (Hartman’s). yes, i actually asked before i signed the consent form. i had this vision of those guys in the back of the store with the bloody aprons…

Charles commented that it was nice for him not to have to sign a consent form of mine for a change. in November that was something he had to do before they would operate on me. even though, if they didn’t i would have died. Charles has saved my bacon more than once during this whole ordeal. now i get to try and play along.

if they are able to go in laparoscopically this will mean only a small incision and a bunch of air blown in to distend my stomach. better than the alternative, which requires reopening the existing incision (aka Highway 61).

this should mean that i will be in hospital less time than i would be with the full highway treatment. we shall see.

i don’t know when it will happen yet. i’m hoping for sometime this summer.

having more surgery is either a daring or a foolhardy act.i suppose  i could die on the operating table or i could get an infection, like two of my friends. after all i could just live with the ileostomy bag and lead a wonderful life, there’s no question of that. but i am very healthy; i’m only 46 years old and it would be great not to have to have the bag. i want to take a bath without worrying about my flange, wear clothes without the uncomfortable feeling of them pressing against my stoma. and i can’t believe it isn’t healthier to have all my organs on the inside of my body rather than having part of my small intestine on the outside. besides, life is out of my control. witness recent earthquake. anything can happen at any time. might as well live this life having done everything i can to make sure it’s a good one, for me and those i love.

in the meantime to get my lazy bum muscles back in gear so that i don’t have to walk around in adult diapers, i have to do 200 kegels a day. now you will accurately be able to call me a tight ass…

once i know when the surgery is scheduled, dear friends, i shall let you know.

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4 Responses to “open sez me (and the surgeon too)”

  1. Pearl Says:

    one can only work with the knowledge one has and go for the future.

    hopefully after you’ll be back to your regular number of spoons after surgery…

    i.e. spoon theory…http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/personal-essays/the-spoon-theory-written-by-christine-miserandino/

  2. amandaforward Says:

    that was a very interesting article. thanks, Pearl.

  3. Gillian Wallace Says:

    Definitely go for it, Amanda. Full health to you.

    And thanks for the link, Pearl. Yeah.

  4. 2010 in review-something cool Wordpress does! « Firebirds and Phoenix Says:

    […] open sez me (and the surgeon too) June 2010 3 comments […]

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